When Your Loved Ones Get Hurt or Killed

For man to have family means lot of things. Family means a lot of work and worries, but also a lot of happiness. A good family means support when you are having problems or you are in some difficult periods of your life of course.

When SHTF it can work in both ways too, bad and good, but definitely having family will help you more than being alone.

I mentioned many times why it is better to be with other (close) people when SHTF then to be alone. My course where I talk in detail about my experiences in war has many situations that I would not have survived without my family.

There is one other side to that, during SHTF when anarchy and fighting for survival means violence and you see people close to you get hurt or killed.

Lots of people here in my country have gone through that, including me, and of course after first reactions that are common to all of us (grief, anger, sadness…) we react different.

How we managed to cope with the pain, formed our whole future life, it formed us, destroyed some, and even gave strength to few.

When you lose someone because of illness or old age or traffic accident, maybe you may accuse bad health system, or similar, or even God, but eventually you will say „It is life, we all gonna die, it is how it is supposed to be“.

But when you lost someone close because someone shot him during a fight between two opposite groups (because they different, or because the hate each other, or just because one group wanted resources from another group) it is different.

Or let s just say that you are watching your close friend or family member dying because you lack some medicine after everything collapsed, but you know that there is medicine for some people there, and no medicine for others, because of power, wealth, politic or religious reasons.

It can change your whole perspective of life. It can put lots of RAGE in you.

And it is RAGE written in capitals. It lasts for years, and it can drive all your decisions, it can consume you at the end.

I’ve seen (and still see) lot of people here with it.

One example would be guy who watched how his family was killed just because they are different nationality from the killers.

He survived because he played dead, later he said that actually it was not about playing, he simply was shocked and paralyzed. He was 13, he survived his wounds and grew up into man whose mission is to prepare for the next SHTF event, next war.

He finds his meaning of life in preparing for the next SHTF, but with lots of hate and rage, he became obsessed with hating other groups of people, who killed his family, and actually at the end he became like them. He is alone now, no family, just hate.

All his life has become about preparing for revenge. Rage and hate is driving him. He keeps talking about big day of payback. His mission is to make other people lose their families like he lost his one.

Other example is man who lost his daughter who was 9 years old. She suffocated inside burning house that other folks turned on fire, he survived.

He had some period of hard drinking, after that he turned himself towards religion. His life is now about love and forgiveness. He is in some NGO that is trying to create dialogue between victims from all sides. He is alone too and obsessed with his mission.

I drink coffee with him sometimes, he is all into love and forgiveness. He is not really preparing for next SHTF event because he is believing in „non violent solving of problems“ and similar.

Both guys, stories, and examples are how things can end up.

I drink sometimes coffee with the hateful guy too. Where he gives me „adrenaline“, other guy gives me „peace“.
I like both of them for what they are but if you ask me now, I think that for the future SHTF event, they are both running into major problems with their ideas.

First one is blind because of his hate, other dude because of his love. I think (and that is only my opinion) that they both take wrong lessons from their experiences.

It is not all about love and not all about hate. You may call me idiot but yeah too much love and faith into the people may (and will) kill you eventually too.

As I said, I ve lost family members and friends too, and I had my portion of coping with that. And it was not perfect, I had periods when RAGE „colored“ my life dark red, when all my actions were driven by it.

Luckily I overcame that. I have not get ridden of my RAGE but toned it down, so rage now. Probably it is not even possible, but I kinda learned to control it. Sometimes it still controls me, but it is rare.

I like to think that love and hate are parts of life (rage too) and too much of each one can misguide you actually. It is just me, maybe I am wrong. At the end of day, survival is about having options.

Use your love to form strong connections with your group, use your hate to have energy and motivation to reach your goals (but do not let any of these emotions control you).

Have good time with people close to you in coming days. No matter what your mission is, nothing is worth to be alone.

– See more at: http://shtfschool.com/violence/when-your-loved-ones-get-hurt-or-killed/#sthash.AdyTuNuk.dpuf

SELCO

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